Heres The Truth...Finally!

Here's the truth about who I REALLY am...

I'm the product of a big no no back in the 60s...you know...the free love era. Because of this I have had to suffer my whole life since people chose to lie to me. It wasn't pleasant to feel what I had to feel watching my sister get the love and attention from "our" daddy....all the shopping sprees he took her on and when they got back...I had to carry her bags in the house. Nothing there for me at all. I remember for my 1st year of high school all I got was a pair of cheap ass tennis playing shoes...remember those...canvass...I was the laughing stock at school. BTW...I bought them myself with the $11.00  I had in the bank. Then when I was sent to Florida to stay with my grandparents Grandma made me pants out of curtains. Truth is my sister was a heavy girl and I was the looker of the two of us. Believe me when I say it only caused more problems throughout my life. I have spent most of my life alone.

 Mom....she used me as a punching bag.  My sister was used like a chess piece...manipulation.

My mothers parents owned a bar and her husband was a truck driver so she had plenty of free time to do what ever (if you get my drift). My mother was very beautiful outside and all the men noticed her. She knew it too. So many stories I could tell you.

It wasn't hard to notice while growing up that the family didn't pay much attention to me except for punishment time. My mother used to make me stand in the middle of the living room and have her dog Elmer attack me ripping my clothes off and leaving teeth marks all over me. She also used to move all the furniture in the living room back and her and her little brother would have me and my big sister fight in the middle of the room. My mother wanted to see me get beat up for some reason.

I wish she was alive today because I want her to face me! They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger...hmmm...being thrown down the cellar stairs in the pitch blackness, thrown down the 2nd floor stairs, head split open on the crystal front door knob a few times, head split open with an old fashioned nut bowl with cracker and picks, and many other things. Then when she did that shit to me her little brother Joe would come over and thrash me even more for making his big sister cry.

Who am I?...the throw away kid, the outcast, the product of a cheating wife. If you saw me out there you would think I was well put together in about every way. You would never know by looking at me how I was raised and treated. I have been to college, and I speak perfect English with a professional tone. Hey, I am English! My mother married a German man so my sister is German but I have found out I am English. My bio father is 100% with no mix at all. That explains why my sister and I look so different. Turns out that I also have a younger sister and a brother as well. My little half sister looks alot like me!!! My father also wears my face!!! Finally...someone who looks like me. I always wondered why no one in my entire family looked anything like me...no cousins, aunts or uncles...no one...not on "daddys" side of the family. That would be because he wasn't my father.

People seem to think something like this would have little affect on a person but thats not true.

to be cont'd